“Do You Know About Underwear?”

So I was walking through Target yesterday, just headed up that main aisle that connects the front entrance back through the clothing to the turn towards electronics. You know the one, because every Target is laid out the same way.

Anyways, I’m walking up that aisle, and some random woman asks me, “Do you know about underwear?”

This took a minute to process. I wasn’t wearing a belt. Had my cargo shorts sagged a little too much and I forgot to put any undergarments on today? I mean, that’s literally never happened to me, but maybe? Nope, I was all set with my own clothing.

Was she going to ask me advice about which underpants her lover would prefer? Because I’m not sure I’m qualified to give someone else’s opinion on something so intimate.

Oh, you know what? I bet she thought I was an employee. Which is odd, because all Target employees wear red shirts and khaki pants as part of the store uniform. But whatever.

“I’m sorry, I don’t work here,” I responded.

“Oh! I’m sorry. You just looked so official,” she responded.

Did I? Really?

With my hair being all curled from the moisture, and me being kinda wet since I just came in from out of the rain? I really don’t think so, but I guess it’s up for interpretation. Looking official is in the eye of the beholder, or whatever.

“Naw, sorry. All I know about underwear is that I wear it,” I said. That doesn’t even make sense, Andy. But, like…How the heck was I even supposed to respond to this conversation?

So I politely walked away, and just continued to be confused until I happened upon the TMNT ReAction figures I posted about, yesterday.

This was far from the first time I’ve randomly been mistaken for an employee at places I don’t work, but it IS the first time underpants were involved in such a conversation.

I hope you enjoyed this dumb story as much as it confused me.